Life did not start out easy for Candace Sanchez, but she hasn’t let that define her or stop her from dreaming – and achieving – big.
“From age 5 until I was 15, I was abused by my uncle and my stepfather. When I was 15, I thought I was pregnant by my abuser, and I wanted to die by suicide,” she shared. “My childhood and adolescence were extremely traumatic, and I didn’t deal with that trauma until I was much older.”
When she was a senior in high school, Candace was in a relationship and became pregnant. At the time, she was still living in the same house as her stepfather.
“Being in high school, marriage was not an option. My daughter’s father was 16, I was 17. I was basically a kid, having a kid. I hadn’t dealt with my trauma from being abused, and now dealing with being a very young mom.”
She didn’t tell her own mother about the abuse until after she’d had her second daughter, and she didn’t break her silence by choice.
“I wasn’t ready to talk about it yet, but my daughters’ father said if I didn’t say something, he would. I was scared of what would happen if I told my mom about the abuse,” she admitted.
But her mother was supportive and immediately removed Candace’s stepfather from their home, but it took her longer to completely end the relationship. At 19, Candace landed her first job in health care.
“I started working as a receptionist in the pediatric department of a medical group. But my trauma was still affecting me every single day, both in my personal and professional life.”
Because she now had benefits, Candace was able to start therapy and finally address what had happened to her in her childhood and teenage years.
“I believe working in health care saved my life. Starting in my early 20s, I saw a therapist for 10 years,” she shared. “That’s when I started to truly understand. I didn’t know how trauma would affect me for the rest of my life.”
Candace worked in many different roles in health care over the years. In 2017, she decided it was time to tell her story publicly to help other survivors.
“I wrote a book that I titled Unspoken because I wasn’t supposed to tell. It took three years to write it because in doing so, I was constantly reliving my childhood,” she shared. “It was like ripping off the Band-Aid over and over again.”
Six months after publishing her book, Candace launched a podcast to help other silenced voices be heard.
“We talk openly about ‘taboo’ topics in order to spark difficult and uncomfortable conversations. We allow a safe place for anyone who has experienced trauma, including sexual and domestic violence.”
She also became a motivational speaker, an advocate for survivors and a life coach.
“I didn’t realize how many people would reach out to me after the book to tell me their story was similar to mine,” she said. “Without knowing it, I was becoming a resource for other survivors.”
Hope Shining Blue
In 2016, Candace was invited by a friend to attend Aurora Health Care Foundation’s Hope Shining Blue event, which raises critical funds for survivors of sexual and domestic violence.
“I sat in the audience and just cried. I felt like I was in the right place with other survivors, and to see them being honored and celebrated was so inspiring. I knew I wanted to get more involved and help as much as I can.”
Candace joined the Aurora Healing & Advocacy Services Giving Circle. Members donate $1,000 each year and decide as a group how to allocate funds raised.
“I knew I had found my people in the Giving Circle. They believe in me and support me; they’re like family,” she shared.
In 2020, Candace accepted a position at Advocate Aurora Health, which is now a part of Advocate Health. Today, she’s the Information Technology Strategic Partnerships Director.
Now Candace is being honored with the 2023 Thrive Award at the Hope Shining Blue event on April 26. The award was established in 2014 and recognizes a sexual assault survivor who is healing and thriving in life, and whose work in the community benefits survivors and promotes awareness of sexual assault issues.
“I’m nervous, anxious and excited; I’m honored and humbled by this recognition.”
And her healing journey continues at the Aurora Healing Center.
“My therapist, Maryann, is helping me prepare for the event. The trauma never goes away; I’m constantly trying to repair things. She helps me recognize that it’s okay to be upset, angry or depressed. She helps me realize I can give myself grace,” said Candace. “And she helps me see how far I’ve come and how much I’ve accomplished.”
How you can help
Aurora Healing & Advocacy Services provides crisis intervention and long-term healing services for survivors of sexual and domestic violence. Services are free and are only possible because of the generosity of donors.
“I’m happy and thriving. I love working in health care and technology. I love my advocacy. And I get to love my wonderful family – my two daughters and five grandchildren.”
You can help survivors like Candace heal and thrive by making a donation to support Aurora Healing & Advocacy Services.
If you’re currently in crisis, please call our 24/7 confidential hotline at 414-219-5555.